Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Financial Sarcasm Roundup for 11/24/15

I should have blasted this out yesterday but cleantech thoughts kept me occupied all day long. It is better to be clean than dirty. Just ask any pig headed to the slaughterhouse.

Wall Street averages continue to rise in spite of global economic headwinds. Greater fools are always ready to rush into the top of a bull market. I have been waiting for these fools to get financially kneecapped for the past several years. The spectacle will be worth the wait. My cash will be ready when the top-buyers are all broke.

The Federal Reserve may raise rates in December, according to the consensus interpretation of its most recent notes. It's important to remember that the Fed can immediately reverse itself if a rate increase proves too explosive for the system's emergency brakes. Our mandarins are playing it by ear because they have enticed every investor to take on extraordinary risks. The first rate rise past 0.25% will test the yield curve's long end, and make long-duration bondholders wonder whether their portfolios are safe.

Some obsessive food selfie people have figured out that restaurants and other food service sector companies will monetize their food photos on Instagram and other social media sites. It's great that people who want us to know what they eat will make money from their idle habits. Eating is a natural function, so perhaps we can take other natural functions to their logical monetary conclusions. People who take shower selfies can sell Instagram advertising space to makers of soap and shampoo. Do I have to mention other bathroom functions? Don't make me go there.

I promised my cleantech contacts that I would clean up my act. I behaved myself this time around. My word is my bond.